Monday, May 28, 2007

A day in the life of a DOG...

I hope you all had a fabulous Memorial Day... As you can tell.. Oreo spent hers relaxing on the dining room window seat. She was so sound asleep on Friday I couldn't resist snapping a few pics. No one can say this dog isn't spoiled..

A day in the life of a dog...

6:00 a.m.-6:15 a.m. Whines to be let out of the house.
6:16 a.m. Rushes to garden in search of cats.
6:20 a.m. No cats. Turns attention to newly
planted bulbs.

6:21 a.m. Digs up bulbs.
6:30 a.m. Barks to come inside.
6:32 a.m. Barks again - more loudly.
6:35 a.m. To be sure all within twenty miles have heard,
barks again.
6:40 a.m. Breakfast.
6:45 a.m. Sleep.
8:00 a.m. Food smells from kitchen. Wakes and goes
to
investigate. Hangs around chair of youngest human.
Catches most food before it hits the floor.
8:32 a.m. Back to sleep.
9:30 a.m. Mail arrives. Waits for door to open and
chases
letter carrier.
9:45 a.m. Sleep.
11:00 a.m. Vacuum cleaner switched on. Leaps from
chair and
flees sound. Goes to another room. Sleeps.
12:30 p.m. Lunch sounds from kitchen. Scurries past
newly
filled dog dish. Arrives first at table. Waits for food
to drop from table. None. Goes to dog
dish filled with
food the TV ad says is irresistible
to dogs. Sniffs. Looks
around to make sure
there's nothing better. Sighs. Eats.
1:30 p.m. Whines at door to go out.
1:35 p.m. Whines at door to come in.
1:40 p.m. Hears friend barking outside. Whines to go
out again.

1:45 p.m. Door opens. Leaps from house and joins
friends
chasing cars.
2:45 p.m. Still chasing cars, with the odd cat thrown in
for
variety.
3:00 p.m. Decides to call on girl-friend up the street.
She is
sleeping.
3:05 p.m. Good Idea. Goes home and does the same.
4:00 p.m. Children arrive home from school. Dog barks,
yells,
goes crazy. Told to calm down. Barks and yells some more.
4:07 p.m. Grabbed by collar and thrown out of the house.
4:09 p.m. After barking fails to open door, decides to call
on
girl-friend once more. She has gone out. Runs to park. Finds
another girl.

6:00 p.m. Dinner time. Hurries home.
6:10 p.m. Before door opens, lowers head and adopts
pitiful
appearance.
6:11 p.m. Doesn't work. "Get in here and where the hell have
you been?"
6:12 p.m. Hides under dinner table.
6:55 p.m. Hears rattle of leash. Leaps off best chair and
rushes to front door.
7:17 p.m. At the park. Leash still attached. Sits quietly.
Leash released. Goes Bananas.
7:55 p.m. Off leash.
8:22 p.m. Off leash.
8:55 p.m. Off leash.
9:15 p.m. Owner asks if anyone has seen dog.
9:45 p.m. Owner in luck. Someone has seen a dog swimming
in
nearby lake.
10:00 p.m. Back on leash. Shakes self over owner.
10:05 p.m. Dragged back into house.
10:15 p.m. Settles down in front of TV.
10:35 p.m. Barks to go outside.
10:40 p.m. Barks loudly to come back inside.
10:45 p.m. Barks again before owner can open door.
Neighbour
shouts that baby is trying to sleep. Also advises what owner
should do with dog.

10:46 p.m. Dog barks very loudly in the direction of
neighbour's voice.
10:50 p.m. Door opens. Dog rushes upstairs to bedroom. Hides
under bed. Owner leaves. Dog leaps on bed. Sleeps.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Too funny Lisa!!!!

April Hall said...

HA HA HA! Sounds exactly like the daily routine of my dog!

michelle sturgeon said...

LOL! Sounds about right!

Anonymous said...

Are you sure your dog isnt related to mine?!?

(I enjoy your writing)

a Florida gal,
~V~